Spirit
by Lu78
Summary: If ITSOTG had gone the other way. I know it has been done loads before but i wanted to give it a try.


Title:- Spirit

Category:- Angst

Character:-

Couple Josh/Donna (implied)

Summary:- Set after ITSoTG, although AU. If Josh hadn't made it. I know there have been many done like this but I wanted to try it.

CJ's POV

The doctor walked into the silent waiting room where we all sat, all bar Donna. She had been in the observation room of the OR since Mrs Bartlett had led her there. The look on the doctor's face isn't good. The room goes a little blurry when he tells all of us he is sorry but our friend didn't make it. Mrs Landingham is quietly sobbing, Sam looks in total shock, Leo has his hand over his mouth and Toby is just sitting there. Only then I remember where Donna is. "Where's Donna?" I ask the doctor.

"She is in the room with Mr Lyman." He tells us.

Oh God, she can't be. I walk along the corridor towards the operating theatre, but I know I can't go in there. I can't see his body lying there. I go to where Donna has been for the last fourteen hours before they lost him and look down. She is by his head, whispering something to him before she gives him a kiss and leaves the room. I didn't think I would be able to look at him but there is something about his face. He looks so much at peace.

By the time I am out of the observation room Donna has left the hospital. No one saw her go. Everyone is so wrapped up in their own grief.

As we head out of the hospital one by one we head off in separate directions, though most of us end up back at the White House.

Entering the White House I head straight for my office but stop when I see Donna enter Josh's office. I can't believe she came straight here. The again, it's probably what is keeping her sane. I think about heading over to see her but she quietly closes the office door behind her so I leave her in peace.

My office unfortunately doesn't hold much comfort for me. It's surrounded by memories of him. Photos of us on the first campaign, acting silly like little school children with our father and uncle looking after us. That's how we have always thought of The President and Leo. Hopefully we can get that back soon.

Hours later I am getting ready to give our first press brief, even though there have been bulletins going out all night. I am standing in the door of my office with my black suit on getting ready to head to the press room when I spot the door to Josh's office open and Donna emerge. She is loaded down with boxes and his backpack. Her face is pale and her eyes are red rimmed. She looks lost, but she quickly moves down the corridor before anyone can stop her.

Leo's POV

I am standing here at Josh Lyman's funeral. A place I never thought I would be. His father's happened not that long ago. This shouldn't be happening. Rachel shouldn't be doing this. She has had to bury her family in a way a woman never should. Loosing Joanie at such a young age was hard enough on her, now she has no one left. Though she seems to have latched herself onto Donna.

Now there is a girl who seems to have the weight of the world on her shoulders. She came straight to Rachel's side after she had cleared josh's office. She helped to plan his funeral, as Rachel puts it she took over everything and for that Rachel is glad. She couldn't bear to plan another child's funeral.

Everyone has headed back to Josh's Georgetown home. Rachel agreed he should be buried in Washington. She said it was where he belonged. The house just seems so empty without him there. I am so used to seeing his vivaciousness around. It is going to be really hard not to see it in the White House anymore.

I try to catch Donna on many occasions but she seems to be the Scarlet Pimpernel. She is nowhere to be found during the afternoon. She seemed to slip in and out of the room without anyone catching her. I'll catch her before I leave.

Toby's POV

It's been a week since my 'brother' Josh died. It hard to believe that I will never see his face again. His funeral was hard. Harder than I ever thought it would be. Donna had e-mailed me and asked if I would do his eulogy. I stood there in front of hundreds of people and spoke of the man I thought of as a brother, the man I tried in vain to save that fatal night. I couldn't look at anyone as I spoke. Especially his mother and Donna.

Donna, how am I ever going to be able to look that girl in the face again? Guess it won't be long till I find out. Ginger has just popped her head in my door and said Donna has shown up for work. That girl is too strong for her own good.

I walk over to their bullpen and I see her handing an intern a document. "I need you to run this over to communications. They are going to need it." Her voice is strong, business like.

"No need. I'm here." My voice seems to have rattled her. I watched her body react to my voice. Her back went ramrod straight, her head was held high. She slowly turned so she was facing me. I don't think I have ever seen someone so pale. Her face is almost translucent; the only colour is the black rings under her eyes. Her eyes that are normally so brilliant blue are so dull in comparison. "Hey Donna, how are you?"

"I'm very well Toby, how are you?" She asks, in a voice that is betraying her every second.

"So-so. Do you need any help?" I ask, knowing that she is running the office until the President and Leo can find a new Deputy. Personally I know Donna could do the job, but without her degree she isn't even on the short list.

"Think I've got it covered Toby, but thanks for the offer." She tells me handing me the form she was giving the intern. "This is marked communications. Hope it wasn't something important."

I scan the paper quickly, relieved to find that it wasn't. "No, something about next weeks visit. Thanks Donna, and remember, if you need anything, just yell."

She gives me a look and thanks me before walking into his office, her shoulders slumped, her body crumbling as she walks across the threshold. What can I do to help her?

Leo's POV

Can you believe it's been almost a month since he has been gone? I know I can't and it's hard to think he hasn't been here in all that time. We finally announced a new deputy chief two weeks ago. Edward Hallfield. He is a good man, but no Joshua Lyman. He has taken on the job with full steam. He wasn't happy about keeping Donna but when we explained that she knew the office and filing system better than anyone he reluctantly kept her on.

I am beginning to regret that decision now. The way he talks to her and treats her. Josh would be turning in his grave. But Donna being who she is gets on with whatever he asks. It is beginning to tell on her. I watch as she moves around the bullpen, she has lost her vitality for life and I desperately want to get it back for her. If only I knew how?

CJ's POV

I am taking Donna out to dinner tonight. She deserves it. I feel really bad, as I haven't had the time for her since that day. It's terrible to say but to talk to her I know I would break down in tears but now, I feel strong enough to talk to her for longer than a few minutes. Edward has taken over Josh's office in a way I know Donna doesn't like. She looks ill and I hope that I have the courage tonight to ask her about it.

"CJ." I look up to find Donna standing at my door. "Can I take a rain check on tonight?"

"Oh, something else come up?" I ask.

"Just not feeling all that great." She answers without looking at me. That is one thing I have noticed since he has been gone. She doesn't look anyone in the eye any more.

"Are you still up for company though. I mean instead of going out we could stay in?" I asked, watching as her eyes lit a little when I mentioned it.

"If that's all right with you?" She said in a quiet voice. She looked off into the distance before looking back to the floor.

"So I'll come over to yours about 7pm." Yes we were actually getting out of here early tonight.

"Yeah, only I don't live there any more." She is getting quieter as she speaks. As if it is a big secret where she is living. I look at her and she catches my eye. "I'm living in Josh's apartment."

"Okay, I'll be there at seven then." I don't even question why, because I know. Where else would she be? She nod's her head before leaving the office. I just hope I can talk to her tonight and get to the bottom of all of this.

Leo's POV

CJ told me that Donna was living in Josh's house and that she was going to see her that evening. I asked if she minded being a little late so that I could go and visit first.

So here I am standing outside his door. The only problem is, she isn't answering. Now she knows CJ is coming over so she should be in, so how come she isn't answering the door? My cell phone starts to ring in my pocket and when I pull it out I see CJ is on the line. "Leo, she just called me, she isn't in right now, won't be back till later. Maybe your best to leave it to another night."

"Yeah, maybe you're right." I answered before walking away from the door. Glancing up I was sure I could see a shadow at one of the windows but maybe I was wrong.

Toby's POV

Edward Hallfield is an ass. He won't listen to reason; the President is close to firing him. He can't understand why he hired him in the first place. I am heading across to the bullpen when I hear the shouts. Running forward I see Donna standing her ground in front of the office door. Edward is standing in the doorway. "I really don't know why I was convinced into keeping you. You are a useless piece of work." Edwards face is red as he bellows at Donna.

"I should have quit when you started." She retorts.

"Wish you would. I could do this job much better without you." He states.

"No you couldn't. Do you know why? You are no Josh Lyman. And don't even pretend that you are. He was and always will be ten times, in fact a hundred times the man that you will ever be. I quit." She says as she grabs her bag and disappears out of the White House.

"What was all that about?" A voice from behind startles everyone. The young interns who were still in their seats throughout the fight are on their feet as The President walks further into the bullpen.

"You so called special assistant, she was worthless, and so I gave her the sack. Better off without her anyway." Edward replied, forgetting whom he was talking to.

CJ has to hold me back from belting him one. The President looks close to it as well. "Mr Hallfield I would be grateful if you didn't talk about my staff like that. Donna is an integral part of this administration. You had no right to sack her. Only I can do that and it gives me great joy to do it just now. Mr Hallfield, I'd like you to turn in your badge and have you desk cleared out by tonight. I never want to see your face in this building again." The President announced before walking off to a standing ovation from the employees.

The bullpen erupts with cheers and claps. It's astounding to watch. The President walks back towards the Oval Office but not before glaring at Edward one last time.

At Senior Staff that afternoon the President corners CJ. "I need you to find Donna for me."

"Shouldn't be a problem sir. She'll either be at home or the place I have found her on one too many occasions." CJ explains and we all understand where Donna will be.

"Maybe you should leave it to me then CJ, I'll bring her back." The President tells us before dismissing us for the day.

POTUS's POV

The sun is just beginning to set across Arlington as I do the slow walk towards Josh's burial site. CJ told me that she would be here and she wasn't wrong. I am not even close to the grave and already I can see her blonde hair blowing in the wind. As I get closer I can see her shoulders heave and closer still I can here her crying.

"Donna." I say quietly, so not to scare her. She quickly wipes her eyes before standing and facing me.

"Sir, what are you doing here?" She asks, terrified that she has been found. I have never seen Donna look so fragile. She was always the strong one in the group. The one who kept everyone else in line. The one who despite everything that was thrown at her was always there, with her grit determination and a smile. A smile that has been lacking since we lost a very important member of our group.

"CJ told me that I would probably find you here. Thought I'd join you tonight if that's all right?" She nods before leading me to the bench that has been erected across from his headstone. I take a note of the inscription on the bench, 'you'll always be in my heart and never be forgotten.' I know it was her that commissioned the bench, I just hadn't realised how deep their relationship was. "So I hear, Edward fired you today?"

"No sir, I quit." She tells me defiantly.

"Well, I'd like you to reconsider." I tell her. She starts to shake her head but I raise my hand so I can continue to speak. "Edward Hallfield no longer works for me. I have someone else in mind for the job. Someone I should have offered it to in the first place."

"Sir I can't work for anyone else. Don't worry about me, I'll find a job somewhere else."

"But I want you to have the job." She looks astonished. "You and Leo will work very closely together working out what needs to be done and he will take a lot of the work from you while you finish your degree at night school."

"You mean it?" I nod and before I can say anything she has her arms around me. "Thank you Mr President."

"You deserve it. You deserve some happiness after everything you have been through." I tell her as I wrap my arm around her shoulder before leading her back to the car.

Christmas Time.

CJ's POV

Well the smile is back and it is great to see. Donna is working as Deputy Chief of Staff for President Bartlett after completing her degree. She wants to continue to study more, but she knows the hours she will have to work nowadays but she's happy. After the year we have had, she deserves it. She truly is the spirit of this administration.


End file.
